Deep Fried Epiphany

Going for the record today by bringing FOUR tupperware containers and ONE glass jar to work today for lunch. FIVE re-usable containers. One lunch. Personal best for sure.

Oh and before I get too many tweets about this <— (dressing for the job I want)
The contents are peanut-chocolate cookies; oatmeal with maple syrup and banana; cheese puffs; chicken with bbq and gouda; yogurt; and iced tea.

Next note, I guess one is for breakfast.

Second to last note, we have granite counter tops in our new apartment cause it’s bangin.

Last note, it’s not PEE, I said it was iced tea and I MEANT IT.

Phew, I just saved myself a lot of time answering tweets from strangers.

Second in a series.

Hi guys. Do you know what my most-viewed post is? Well, Breaking Bad viewing party food!!! of course, but do you know what comes in an admittedly far second?

Five pictures of whipping cream.

Proving further still people out there really just want to know the basics and the foodie world is still a small one if we’re taking an ACTUAL poll out there not a hipster poll including some fringe hipsters.

Sometimes I go to certain concerts and am the only person NOT wearing a scarf, then one time I went to a NOFX concert on a cold day and was the only person who WAS wearing a scarf. This is how hipsters dictate our lives and bring themselves to the foreground of everywhere a young person might ever want to be. Hipsters>temperature, or so they behave.

Those five pictures of whipping cream with each passing day grow increasingly old and I have since obtained more pixels and have more photo practice in my bones, so I took another set and here they are for you to Google.

These ones contrarily are TOO bright, and I was going to try and spend time on that in a Photoshop capacity, but um like several (like a BIG several) months passed and my “everything should be perfect” phase was over so we’ve now entered the WHO CARES phase and the answer is no one because it’s fine.

In order to have whipping cream, you first need to purchase or milk into a bucket some heavy cream or “whipping cream,” which is the former with some extra helpers added. Trickling Springs Creamery supplies dairy to the PA area.

Then you need to whip by hand or machine with a whisk until bubbles form. This is called air.

Then you need to keep whipping. This is more a continuation of step two rather than step three. It will hold some shape soon.

Then the cream will gain more air and gently hold some sort of shape. Then you need to keep whipping.

We did it!!

Finally you come to the final result of a liquid-gone-solid by incorporating so much air and the cream has been whipped! A little too much so in the situation pictured above. Psh, kinda like Adam Linder, singer-songwriter-guitarist for the indie-punk band Sister City, amirite?!?! Way too much whipped.

Then you can also have a bowl of hot fudge since this has become a full-on event. And add a bit of powdered sugar to the cream according to your preference.

Ice cream sundae, we have arrived!

Baby Jaden has also arrived awwwwww!!!!!

He’s just lookin out at stuff.

They probably make seedless grapes like those movies where naked people package coke down a long table and they just take the seeds out and pass the empty grapes down the line and be naked so no one steals any grapes or seeds, ‘else they get SMACKED or worse, and I imagine lots of sexual abuse takes place as well. Probably. #foodpolitics

A photo essay of an actual thought sequence I had…

“Wow, the kitchen is really messy.”

“Okay all better.”

You know, put yourself in someone else’s shoes. I had never thought about what to do with stillborn kittens or puppies but apparently a lot of people have. I gather it’s a real problem in our world.

As far as stillborn babies, most people bury them I think according to many works of fiction.

My main question at the time was what to do with Stilton cheese (as you can see, I had already consulted Wikipedia) that I bought on a whim before I discovered it was a dry, linty cheese, put it in a frittata and despondently ate for breakfast for the next week.

Linty as in “reminiscent of lint.”